cosas, cosas, cosas, things, things, things.  and more things.  one more week and i return home to california just in time for the end of spring, for that much needed rest and relaxation.  i am sorting through all the beautiful things my mother bequested and i realize, in spite of their beauty, how few things i really need at this junction in my life.  all i want is to give everything away, their emotional weight is more than their worth and i truly don't want more things in my life.  if anything, i want less and less, quality rather than quantity.

there was a time when i wanted.  a time when i had to possess in order to be happy.  now, the lighter the load, the happier. things enslave you, they blur the vision.  that does not mean i don'tadmire creativity and the myriad of new things appearing every day on the market.  to live, one must create on a daily basis.  the paradox is that we don't need much to be happy, truly happy. 

as i head home i embrace the customs of the land that has given me refuge for the last 12 years, the america i have studied endlessly in order to appreciate it.  and i look ahead to my studio to complete custom orders and to my shop where i will be listing alot of those "things".

i cannot say i will miss chile, at least not for the moment.  i have lived in a twilight zone for four months, traumatic beyond words, with too many bad happenings one after the other.  i had looked to chile with hope and possibility but the experience has taught me otherwise, home is surely where the heart is.